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Shane's Story
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I had 2 sons, Shane and Shawn, born 1 yr and 1 day apart. They were very close all thru their lives.
28 members of my family has had open heart surgeries, mine a 5 way bypass at age 38. Altho the drs didnt give me very good odds of making it thru the surgery, I told them I knew the Great Physician!!! This was on July 5th 1993. I came thru this great and my other 2 brothers had to have the same surgery within the next month. My brother closest to me in age had already had this surgery at the same age as me.
I was born and raised in Newport Arkansas moving to Calif when I was 16. I lived there off and on for almost 20 years and have some wonderful friends there.
On March 10 1995 my oldest son, Shane was shot and killed. We were told that it was a suicide, which I knew in my heart wasnt so because Shane had a great belief in God and had talked to many of his friends when they confessed to him that they were considering it. We knew that there was an argument between him and his girlfriend for about 3 hours that night. A friend of my sons went to tell my other son about the argument and that there was a 12 gauge shotgun out that belonged to the girlfriend. The police got behind Shawn and this friend cause they were speeding but they didnt stop. As Shawn jumped out of the car and ran into the kitchen entrance of the house. A gun was fired from the living room. Shawn saw the girlfriend and Shanes best friend run out of the living room screaming and run outside.He ran in and threw the gun and picked Shane up and was holding him. They had to call out the entire police department to subdue him. There was 6 other kids there besides Shawn and we asked for gunpowder tests but they didnt perform them. 33 days later, the autospy report came back showing 000 gunpowder residue on any part of Shanes body and 000 drugs or alcohol. The girlfriend stated that he had cooked her a candlelit dinner, which he did and that he had ate but there was no food in his stomach at all. The crime lab kept my son for 6 days and their report from Little Rock was that further investigation was needed, o% chance of self inflicted.
The police dept got the report the same day as I did but refused to investigate any further stating that they had messed up and didnt do gunpowder residue tests of the other kids that night and now it was too late to do them. We dont believe that anyone did this on purpose,we think there was a struggle and the gun went off but neither one of the ones in the room will tell us anything cause they are afraid. I pray that 1 of them come to us and tell us what happened that night because they are both drug users and alcoholics now and have been ever since that night. No one has seen either straight since that night.
The girlfriend does some demonic things,calling me constantly and asking for Shane for awhile. Now she just calls and doesnt speak a number of times a day. She has destroyed wreaths left by us and Shane's son. taken every angel we put on his grave and literally terrorizes my son, Shawn. I pray for this girl for I know that she has been known to dabble in witchcraft in the last few years and I pray that she accept the Lord and come to us and tell us what happened. It took me a long time before I could pray for her because if not for God I would have lost my mind.
I still have trouble forgiving and I fall to pieces any time I run into her or even see her. She took my son awayy from me. He was my life and this just isnt easy to forgive, if possible at all. I pray that I can because I want to join Shane in heaven one day. This person just does so many cruel things, leaving letters on his grave for us to find, stealing the angel and other things we put on his grave. I have problems understanding why God lets people like her live and takes innocent young people like Shane and others that I know from online and in person??? She steals or destroys every flower we put on his grave.She calls our house and asks for him. When I would fall apart, she would laugh and hang up.She is cruel and destructive to everyone. Yes, it kills me to see her or even see her mom and know that she had her daughter but because of her daughter, my son is no longer with me. He cant have any more children or any more birthdays. He cant hug or even meet his niece and nephew, Brylan Shane and Breanna Shade. I question God, oh yes, I question Him daily though I know we shouldnt. Why God??? I needed him more than You God??? Why my Shane? Why God Why??????? My mom is 83 yrs old and she has lost 2 of my brothers in less than 3 yrs. A year later she lost her husband??? Questions???? Oh yes, I have many questions.
Since this night, she has told others there was a struggle for the gun and it went off, that they didnt know if it was her or Shane's best friend who actually pulled the trigger but there was 6 there and none of them had gun residue tests taken of their hands. I took all the reports, statements, autopsy report, pictures, everything to Calif and Nevada and paid to have the authorities there go through all. I was told the same as I was told by the Crime Lab, that it was 000% chance self inflicted, that also Shane would have had to be 7'4 for the bullet to exit where it did. He was 6'2-6'3? His girlfriend has had affairs with over half the police force here. I know there will be no justice for Shane's here on earth but she will stand before God one day and He is the one and only true ultimate Judge. This is all that gets me through each day is knowing that one day she will stand accountable. Since Shane was killed, a friend of theirs brought me pictures that was taken that night of him cooking dinner, etc,etc and he looked so happy. She had made the statement to may that I would never see these pics and I didnt for 6 years. Not 1 day went by that I didnt pray for them and one day they were delivered to my door by someone who found them in a house that the girlfriend had rented and left them. She went back later to get them and was furious they had been taken. I also was brought pics of her and parties she was at in later years showing people doing drugs, drugs in the pics, poems she had wrote of how everyone hated her and a sheet of paper that she wrote March 10, 1995, I did it, now what? I took the drug pics and some of the stolen credit cards she had and this letter into the police and told them this is the night my son was killed, this is a confession. They said they would check it out and get back to me. I never heard a thing? She continues to go to the cemetery and leave things although I call the police each time. She has left notes, destroyed flowers, stolen 21 angels from his grave and even bought a special hutch to keep these stolen angels. This person has terrorized my family especially me and Shawn, my only child on earth. She has told him he needs to get over it? I wonder if her Mom would get over it if she was taken from her and put into a grave, to never get to see or touch her again on this earth? This woman is pure evil and does things so cruel and demonic, I still have difficulties that someone could be this cruel and evil. She has destoyed flowers, wreaths, angels, etc left on Shane's grave. Whenever she goes out there, she will change everything on his grave, leave a note or something to let me know she was there although its private property as we have the deeds to the entire front of the cemetery bought in 1955, the year I was born so she cant say shes at the one next to or in front of because we own the whole front, yet she continues to go there.
I had 3 heart attacks in a yrs time and 2 nervous breakdowns but PTL!!!! I knew when I came thru the death of my son victorious and quit blaming God that there was nothing satan could throw at me that could defeat me cause even in death, I still win for I will be with the Lord!!!In Jan 2001 I had my 4th heart attack and the whole state was covered in ice. My heart drs are 35 miles away so I got online with a sister in the Lord and she prayed with me thru it. This was on a friday nite. On Mon. I went in to my dr and told him that I had a heart attack. I dont think he believed it til he did an EKG which showed that I had. They did another stint surgery,have had 12 put in and kept me 12 days, I came home and was posting in one of my christian groups when I fell from my chair unconsious.
I came to a few hours later and drug myself to the phone and called my mom. She rushed over and took me to the hospital where tests showed that I had a massive stroke. They kept me 13 days and wanted to put me in a nursing home telling me I would never use my left hand again. I refused and told them I wasnt claiming this, that God wasnt thru with me yet. 4 days after coming home, I was typing with my left hand!! PTL!!!!
In Nov 2001 I had my 5th heart attack and it shut down all the arteries in my heart. They rushed me into surgery telling my mom that my chances were very slim but I told her that if God wasnt ready for me I would make it and if He was I would wake up in glory with Him!!! I came thru the surgery and had another stint surgery a week later and started heart treatments. The drs say that I am a walking miracle!!!! I tell them that I give God all the praise and glory!!!! Thru all of this, quite a few drs and nurses have accepted the Lord so I believe there is a reason for everything!!
I went to my hear doctor July 10th and he has informed me that the damage is bad to my heart.He hopes that another open heart is an option but I am praying for a miracle.I go into cath surgery July 22nd to find out what my options are.I told him the devil was a liar! When he asked what I meant,I asked him,how many of his patients had lived thru 5 heart attacks? He informed me that i was the only one he had that had went thru that many and lived.PTL!!! I told him that I would be here until Jesus got ready for me.At this time,he says that the bottom left side of my heart is dead and the entire back part,but I am confident that the Lord will bring me thru this also.This too shall pass!!GB,DJ
I may never see tomorrow,
There's no guarantee,
And things that happened yesterday
Belong to history.
I can't predict the future,
I cannot change the past,
I have just the present memories
To cherish as my last.
I must use this moment wisely,
For it will pass away,
And then be lost forever
As a part of yesterday.
I must exercise compassion;
Help the fallen to their feet,
Be a friend unto the friendless,
Help to make their life complete.
The unkind things I do today,
May never be undone,
And friendships that I fail to win,
May never more be won.
I may not have another chance
On bended knees to pray,
I thank God with a humble heart
For giving me this day!
~author unknown~
I had a light heart attack around the first of September>I was taken to the Er by my son and an EKG showed that I was having a heart attack.I checked out AMA,however,because they couldnt find a vein to get blood from much less an iv here in Newport.The EKGS were sent to my surgeon,who called me the next day to come in.He informed me that the risks were too great to ever do surgery on my heart again.He said there was really nothing they could do about the damage anyway.But I am still believing God for a miracle! I know that He will watch over me until He gets ready to call me home.I praise Him and thank Him for all He is doing in my life.He has kept me safe thru numerous heart attacks and other health issues.He has blessed me with some wonderful friends and family.TY Jesus!
My oldest son was shot and killed over 7 years ago and I felt that I
had lost both my sons that night.I only had 2 children,sons,Shane and
Shawn,1 yr and 1 day apart in age.They were very close and Shawns
anger has been so bad since that night that I didnt know him anymore
and really felt that I had lost both. He is going thru a divorce with
his wife right now and thru prayer,finally realized that he had a
problem with pain pills.They made him stay angry all the time.It has
been years since he talked to me without screaming at me.When God
finally showed him this problem,he stopped taking them and went thru
horrible withdrawals.I was with him during this and was so afraid
cause he was so sick.But PTL!!! He brought him thru this and everyone
that knows him has saw the change in him,no more
yelling.screaming,etc.He hasnt raised his voice in almost 3 weeks and
I know that God answered prayer and gave me my son back.TY Jesus! I
dont think I can even express in words the changes in my son.He isnt
the same person anymore.I had said so many times that I felt like I
lost both that night.Ty Jesus for returning my son to me!! GBU,DJ
The latest update on me is that under drs orders,I have moved in with my mom and pop,my stepdad,who is also having health issues right now.It is really working out the best for all concerned for there are many health issues going on with my stepdad and he has to take treatments,tests,etc every day.So I can do these since mom doesnt have the least idea how to do them.I have a number of poems and updates to put on my web pages as soon as I can.GBU and ty for your prayers.DJ
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